Broken Lizard Marathon
This Broken Lizard marathon exists for one simple reason: I somehow made it through life without seeing these movies, and Nathan finally snapped and decided to fix that. So he put together a marathon and said, “You’re watching these. End of discussion.”
Broken Lizard is the comedy troupe responsible for walking the fine line between brilliant stupidity and stupid brilliance, and apparently I’ve been missing out for years. So we’re diving in headfirst, sirens blaring, liter of cola in hand to experience them properly.
Those films are:
Super Troopers
Beerfest
Club Dread
The Slammin’ Salmon
Is this high art? No. Is this necessary? According to Nathan, absolutely. So buckle up, shenanigans will be called, laws will be questioned, and by the end of this I may finally understand why everyone yells “MEOW” at traffic stops. Let’s talk Broken Lizard.
BRAD’S GOLDEN IDOLS
Best Location: Beerfest The Secret Underground Beerfest
Best Character: Salmon Cleon "Slammin” Salmon
Best Kill/Death/Defeat: Dread Boat Dock Kill
Best Score or Soundtrack: RUBBER CHICKEN
Best Screenplay: Troopers Broken Lizard
Best Special Achievement: Troopers Longevity without selling out
Best Scene: TIE Troopers, Dread & Beerfest Johnny Chimpo, Machete Phil & Ping Pong Paddle
Defining Moment/Attribute/MVP: Salmon Every moment with Michael Clark Duncan. I don’t know if he’s the MVP of the marathon, but he’s definitely the MVP of The Slammin' Salmon
Best Director: Troopers Jay Chandrasekhar
Wildcard: Troopers Best Broken Lizard member award
WTF: Dread I’m surprised Nathan has never nominated Club Dread for Rotten Halloween
Worst Picture: The Slammin' Salmon
Best Picture: Super Troopers
Total after deductions:
Super Troopers: 6
Club Dread: 2
Beerfest: 2
The Slammin' Salmon: 1
KYLE’S GOLDEN IDOLS
Best Location: Dread Pleasure Island
Best Character: Salmon Cleon "Slammin” Salmon
Best Kill/Death/Defeat: Beerfest Landfill drowns
Best Score or Soundtrack: Dread Coconut Pete
Best Screenplay: Troopers Broken Lizard
Best Special Achievement: Troopers Jay Chandrasekhar
Best Scene: TIE Troopers & Beerfest Arresting Stoners & Das Boot
Defining Moment/Attribute/MVP: Salmon Michael Clark Duncan
Best Director: Troopers Jay Chandrasekhar
Wildcard: TIE Troopers & Beerfest Best Award Winning Actors Award
WTF: Steve Lemme Races?
Worst Picture: The Slammin' Salmon
Best Picture: Beerfest
Total after deductions:
Super Troopers: 5
Club Dread: 2
Beerfest: 4
The Slammin' Salmon: 1
NATHAN’S GOLDEN IDOLS
Best Location: Dread Pleasure Island
Best Character: Salmon Cleon "Slammin” Salmon
Best Kill/Death/Defeat: Dread Intro kills
Best Score or Soundtrack: Dread Coconut Pete
Best Screenplay: Troopers Broken Lizard
Best Special Achievement: Salmon film during the 2007 writers strike
Best Scene: TIE Beerfest & Dread Arriving at Beerfest & The Tale of Machete Phil
Defining Moment/Attribute/MVP: TIE Troopers & Salmon Kevin Heffernan & Michael Clark Duncan
Best Director: Troopers Jay Chandrasekhar
Wildcard: Beerfest The death and return of Landfill
WTF: Beerfest James K Polk portrait at Beerfest
Worst Picture: Beerfest
Best Picture: Super Troopers
Total after deductions:
Super Troopers: 4
Club Dread: 4
Beerfest: 1
The Slammin' Salmon: 3
JEREMY’S GOLDEN IDOLS
Best Location: Troopers The highways of Vermont
Best Character: Salmon Cleon "Slammin” Salmon
Best Kill/Death/Defeat: Beerfest Final battle USA vs. Germany
Best Score or Soundtrack: Dread Nathan Barr and other artists
Best Screenplay: Troopers Broken Lizard
Best Special Achievement: Beerfest CGI and practical effects in a comedy
Best Scene: Troopers Meow
Defining Moment/Attribute/MVP: Troopers Opening Scene
Wildcard: Beerfest Most Ridiculous Concept Award
WTF: Dread Body Count
Worst Picture: The Slammin' Salmon
Best Picture: Super Troopers
Total after deductions:
Super Troopers: 7
Club Dread: 3
Beerfest: 2
The Slammin' Salmon: 0